"Don't be afraid; just believe"

I can't seem to get enough of this passage of scripture in Mark chapter 5. In verse 23 Jarius, the ruler of the synagogue is at the feet of Jesus, pleading with him to COME lay hands on his daughter for healing so she would live. In verse 24 we see the words, So Jesus went with him.....

Wow, JESUS WENT. I have been chewing on that for a couple days. Jesus went. I wonder if this little girl ever fully comprehend the fact that both her earthly father and her heavenly Father were  there at her healing. That is a story I would have written in my journal and handed down through our family line! Jarius asked Jesus to come. And Jesus did...That sweet child AROSE that day with her earthly father and heavenly Father in the same room together. Can it get any better than that????WOW! That gives me something to think about all day...:) I bet her momma was overwhelmed with joy.

Jesus wants to come to us. He wants us to ask Him to come. In the middle of our pain, in the middle of our confusion. At the point of death. Like Jarius, we have to fall at His feet and give it to Him..... All. Of. It. Jarius knew that as much as he loved his daughter, he alone could not make her well. But he knew who could and he stopped at nothing to get her to Jesus. That sweet child wasn't able to get to the feet of Jesus physically, so her daddy went. Isn't that what we are supposed to do for each other? When we are so worn out, confused, hurting, lost, broken, at the point of death? Take each other to the feet of Jesus?

My friends began to encourage me to seek counseling.  My overall feelings with this was, "what good will that do?" "God can heal me without anyone 's help" (let me just say, yes he can!! and sometimes he uses and gifts others to help us sort out our pain) "no way am I going to a stranger and telling them all of this" "I have made it this far" and on and on and on....

Several weeks after my first meltdown with my "Pearls", (that's what we call each other), I had another one...for those of you reading this who don't know me, you must think I am a mess!!! But I promise you, this is not the norm for me. So by this point I am beginning to believe myself (I know my pearls are laughing here, And I believe myself!!! haha) that I need someone to help me sort through all this junk. We are just having a normal conversation (well, not sure normal is the word, we are a bunch of crazy ladies...) with one of the gals telling us about helping a child who was suffering at the hand of an abuser. Here. We. Go. Again. Numb. Frozen. WHAT THE HECK????? Then one of them asks me if I am alright, ever heard the saying "deer in the headlights?" I guess it was all over my face.... Then dam two bursts forth.....SERIOUSLY!!!! Pull yourself together!!!!

All I could think was, "I wish I had her in my life all those years ago." It was obvious to me that day that I had not even begun to heal. If I had, this would not be so hurtful. I would be able to sit here and rejoice in the fact that that child had my "pearl" in her life but I couldn't do that. In true God fashion, one of the other ladies had just finished up counseling and she radiated Joy, she was healing from a wound of her own. She was proof it was a good thing, that it had worked for her. How could I argue with that?

And so began my commitment to seek counseling....I will admit I fought them tooth and nail, my feet were so dug in the sand that hurricane force winds couldn't have moved me. But sometimes you have to trust those that God has placed in your life. They see things we can't see when we are in the middle of our pain. This is not going to surprise you at all if your a follower of Christ, but one of my "Pearls" is a counselor and she knew just who to call for me,( my only requirement was the counselor had to be a  believer. I had to know that she was getting guidance from the same one I was.).....Isn't that just like our God? I cried out, pleading for Him to heal me, and Jesus went......he went before me and prepared the way, preparing those around me to help me along the way.....but I was still afraid.....Overhearing what they said, Jesus told him. "Don't be afraid; just believe." Mark 5:36 I need to just believe....Lord, help me be brave....

FOR I KNOW THE PLANS I HAVE FOR YOU, SAYS THE LORD,

PLANS FOR YOUR WELFARE AND NOT FOR EVIL,

TO GIVE YOU A FUTURE AND A HOPE.

JEREMIAH 29:11